Everybody Makes Mistakes
"What have I told you, Xan? Choose your target carefully. It's no good going into a club and picking the prettiest one in the room, then expecting nobody to notice you two leaving. And did you bother checking the location before you jumped right in?"
The two cornered vampires glanced back at the wall behind them that had unfortunately blocked their swift departure.
"No, of course you didn't. You grabbed and ran and now we have five... six... seven pissed off Neanderthals closing in, and this is a brand new shirt!"
Xander dropped the drained remains of his meal.
Stronger Than He Looks
There was a quiet snick and then a muttered word that sounded a lot like...
"Spike, did you just say 'oops'?"
"What? No. I... er... Well, yeah."
"But don't worry! Just... Stay there and relax and I'll go and..."
Relaxing just wasn't on the agenda for Xander, not while he was blindfolded and handcuffed to the bedposts, and definitely not while Spike was shuffling away.
"Spike... What happened? What was that weird noise? It sounded kinda like something might have broken."
"Look, there's really no need to panic. I'm sure I've got a spare key around here somewhere."
"I thought it was lube!"
"Well. It. Wasn't."
"I know that now!"
"And that makes me feel so much better, luv, knowing that you finally bothered to read the bloody label! What was that stuff doing on our bedside table anyway? Why do we even have it in the house?"
Xander squirmed, embarrassed.
"I was painting a couple of miniatures to look like us and I must have left it there. Acrylic paint's water-soluble so it's not like this is permanent..."
They looked down at their black-as-ink erections.
"Let's try and keep the grown-up toys separate from yours, eh, Pet?"